Elixir of the gods

For my latest cookbook challenge I made apple cider vinegar. To do so, I simply bought apple cider from my farmer's market and sat some on a shelf in my dining room with cheesecloth on top. Then I waited. That's fucking it. Unfuckingbelievable.

Yet at the same time, so fucking believable. It's fermentation!

I started the fermentation at 10:30 am Saturday, September 20th. I bought the cider the Saturday before, but it took a week to procure and ready the cheesecloth. In the meantime I was lured to swig from the half gallon jug many times. I couldn't help myself from drinking something so tasty and there was the need to spread my germs (to be feasted on during fermentation). Excellent. Excellent.

Until this very day (nearly 6 weeks later), my fermenting apple cider looks like this right here:

top shelf of dining room (generous to call it that) bookshelf

And when revealed looks like this:

(left) apple cider vinegar in ceramic mug   (right) cheesecloth cover

This ceramic cup (above) was filled to that top ring with cider 6 weeks ago. As the sweet cider sat around it became hard cider, and as that sat around, it turned to vinegar. What's left, I kid you not, is apple cider vinegar! 

And it's pretty delicious. Light, bright, alive. I fucking love it. For purported health benefits, I'm drinking a couple teaspoons of my ACV with a pint of water in the morning. I look forward to this now. It's quite refreshing. Who knew?

The mother is also in there. Do you see that film on the left of the liquid, clinging to the cup? That is so gross and cool. IT'S ALIVE!!!!!! (Happy Halloween, by the way!) But what I find craziest are the brown spots on the inside of the cheesecloth. How did color get up there? How exactly did that pattern evolve? How interesting!

This recipe is from Wild Fermentation. Its author, Sandor Ellix Katz, I hereby give a Ph.D. in Fermentation. I bow to you, Dr. Katz. This scientific art form strikes me as unparalleled in its benefits. I want more.

To ferment as much as possible, I have to make it easy. I need a bunch of fermentation crocks. Such as:

"fermentation crock" on google images

Note to self - Attempt making fermentation pots in next ceramics class.

Happy 200 to me!

I was smiling at the thought of my byline the other day, rants I would share with friends over beer if they were near. I was wondering, did I stick to that? As of this, my 200th post, 10% (20 posts) have been labeled as rants. That labeling isn't too scientific, however. My first rant is really just a musing. Sometimes the rants are more like confessionals, or stories turned into an outburst. A couple of times though I've threatened, in jest of course, physical violence in my rants. Once a haunting. Ya know, normal friend chit chat stuff.

Thank you, readers, for being here! I'd love to hear from you.

And now, a vacation day :)

Holiday Gift Guide 2014 - Gifting reflections

Do you know what time it is? Right now, successful bloggers all over the world are working on their gift guides, cleverly tailoring them to showcase their styles and positon on the cutting edge. I am no exception, except for some because I'm done! You’re seeing it here first, folks. Sit back and enjoy the third edition of my holiday gift guide… or more accurately, my gifting philosophy. This year’s philosophy is one of reflection.

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I flew home from the holiday break last year and couldn't get one thought out of my head – how do I have no good coffee or chocolate anywhere? I’m home alone for a few days. No work. Just a few Caturdays ahead. And no coffee or chocolate?

Don’t let this happen to your loved ones this year. Get them great chocolate, good coffee, and a few other staples that no post-holiday lounge time should be without. Such as:

Great. Gorgeous. Gift-worthy. Chocolate.

Delicious tea that seems extravagant but isn’t and will blow your bagged tea out of the water.

A few months ago I got to thinking about lingering pesticides and herbicides on tea leaves, the very leaves I steep for all their goodness, for example. So this got me looking for local, organic tea farms. Behold Light of Day Organics, which sounds like a cult, I know, but stay with me. I purchased a large tin of their Creamy Earl Gray and it’s phenomenal! Buy someone a large tin of one of their go-to’s (my next will be Genmaicha), and pair that with a really solid, efficient strainer. They make cute, novelty strainers out there, but I prefer the industrial stand-by.

VYA! Vya Extra Dry vermouth is the first alcohol I will buy by the case. A friend with posh cocktail sense turned me onto this vermouth and I thank him every few months. If “your friend” likes gin or after dinner aperitifs, buy this. If “your friend” enjoys some bourbon, buy the sweet variety. If “your friend” is a high class swinger, buy her all three of the half-bottles. You’re welcome.

Reward your bar cart.

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In the spirit of reflection, I went back and surveyed my first two gift philosophies. The advice there is just as good today, I think. The first one cracks me up where I tell you four gifting pitfalls. Upon reflection, I have one more to add, (#5) – Ask yourself if you’re buying this for you. Is it you who really wants those Cuppow mason jar lids, and is disguising them as a stocking stuffer for your roommate? Is it you who wants to have a silk kimono, but conveniently forgets that a large Japanese man in 1940 is much smaller than your boyfriend? Maybe reflect on this.

The first year I mentioned which items are really safe if you’re shopping for someone like me (a difficult assessment to make, I know). Things such as:

One way to simplify the search is use keywords of designer brands.

Vintage silk scarves. These things are everywhere on Etsy, and not for exorbitant prices. I prefer large silk squares. They have many uses. Two tips to make this gift as awesome as possible, (1) make sure the colors and patterns are pleasing to the recipient, not necessarily you, and (2) dry clean before gifting. If you really want to be cute, you could use this creatively wrap something smaller. Jewelry comes to mind.

Another thing I said in 2012 is that if you’re going to make a mistake, make it a small one, like earrings. This is still so true. Remember all those awesome vendors from craft fairs you’ve been stalking? Check out their online stores. Lately, jewelry-wise, I’m drawn to vintage pieces. Things with a quiet pop. Lightweight still – more costume than armor. But something unique. Something you won’t find at modern boutiques. Things you might find at the charity shop when your good karma is running high. Things that in the present tense seem one of a kind. Luckily there are curators of these goods on Etsy. Below are all items from one store, The Birdcage. That brooch! That necklace on the bottom left! They will not be available for long if I get my act together.

Just like with silk, do some gentle cleaning of the item before gifting. Some people get a little queasy at the thought of donning vintage, so the cleaner the better. 

The Birdcage Vintage. If you find more shops that curate the vintage with brilliance, please tell me in the comments!

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My philosophy last year was to relax and enjoy the holidays by adapting easy-to-apply gifting themes. This year I’d like to add one more theme.

Theme Five:  The gift of humor

If you’ve been around me at all over the last 4 months, you’ve probably heard me ramble about the book, Improv Wisdom, by Patricia Ryan Madson. Never was I in a better mood than the days I was reading it and the few weeks that followed. Improv isn’t just about stand-up comedy and Second City sketches. Improv is a way of life. It’s a way to see the forest for the trees. To smell ALL the roses. And to say, thanks, you intoxicating sexy roses! Thanks you crazy cool trees! This year I’m giving my parents this gift of humor below, because their senses of humor and mine aren’t unrelated. And one day, I really want to see a squirrel eat out of that horse’s head.

Everyone could use a chuckle. Everyfuckinone.

......

It took a while, but I’ve landed a new tip to unload this year. This tip is useful when you're buying for someone you haven't known for very long, or just don't know very well. In cases like these I may peruse the online gift shops of higher end places and see what they consider gifts (Liberty, Provisions, Williams Sonoma, West Elm, any museum store, any boutique with online store, anywhere they might desire to shop, really). Look above your ideal price point too, because oftentimes you can find similar items at local stores (Paper Source, Home Goods, Etsy) for a little cheaper.

What caught my eye this year (and every year since I was like 6) is blank stationary. I love me some beautiful stationary. I like to touch it and hold it and look at it. I cherish this stuff. I imagine kids of many ages appreciate new stationary when it’s truly the good stuff. But it can't be nearly great. It can't be kinda nice. It has to be noticeably well made. It should be inspiring in its perfection and beauty. Such as: 

All from Liberty

Speaking of people of all ages, my nieces and nephews between 3-6 are each being gifted a mask this year, custom designed with their favorite colors:

I’m a little weary of the commercial superhero costumes. It’s time I encourage them to create their own super-identities. These masks look awesome.

Now let’s talk about the menz. With few exceptions my guides have been generous with unisex ideas. But here’s an idea geared toward the manly. I found this amazing silk pocket square while surfing the gifts from Liberty. My fella appreciates looking snazzy once in a while, so this pocket square (complete with dragons) might speak to him. I know he also appreciates well-made, non-basic socks. How unfair that flair is so often relegated to just women’s accessories! His flair doesn’t come in pink or purple argyle or paisley (unless it’s truly special). Give him magical worlds and dark, mysterious creatures. I think he’d be a little extra happy every day he so-jazzed-it-up. And isn’t that the ultimate point of a gift? To bring happiness?

If your man isn’t adequately gifted with sports paraphernalia, maybe this idea will do the trick.

And now for two final ideas to round out two other gifting scenarios. Scenario 1, your parents or in-laws don’t need anything and a lot of you are struggling to patch together items to please. In this scenario your parent or in-laws are hopefully saying, we don’t need anything, save your money, and you’re hoping that’s true. If so, you buy them the Vya, or Improv Wisdom, or beautiful stationary. But if they don’t pester you to save money, spend that money by going in on a Vitamix. I have one of these. I love it. It’s nice to have something so reliable, and so conducive to healthy living (and frozen cocktails). Although expensive, it will never be regretted.

QVC, Whole Foods, and Costco tend to have Vitamix package deals. The books do help the new owner get the most out of it.

Scenario 2 – You're buying for someone or some couple that likes to wind down by sitting on the couch and watching good TV. Orphan Black. Many of us don’t get BBC America and haven’t seen Orphan Black. Many of us confuse it with that other popular show with an “O” and a “Black”. I Netflixed this and it was marathon-inducing, brain-twisting, bad ass fun that the recipient will want to watch at least two times. I know I do. It’s not crazy complicated (we all know those people who hate shows that they don’t immediately understand), but it is complex. It’s never dull or predictable. Best of all, it stars the best young actress who kills it scene after scene. Give this gift to people who like to zone out on the couch in front of riveting TV or computer games at the end of a long day, or in the middle of the afternoon any old day of the week.

Be my friend,Tatiana. Prices reflect used to new blu-rays on Amazon.

And there you have it, a reflection on past gift giving philosophies and a few new ideas to keep things fresh. May your gifts share much happiness and love with your lucky recipients. And if not, there’s usually next year.

For oneself

What do you do,

for yourself?

For just you. For one.

How do you treat yourself?

Just wondering.

Rose gold for the rosy

A couple of years ago I engaged in a Color Me Beautiful-esque experience. Color Me Beautiful is a program (from the 80's I think) that sought to tell you your ideal color palate, categorized by "season".

My season was first narrowed down into Fall/Spring or Winter/Summer. To do this, gold and silver sheaths are draped over you, alternately, as you and the specialist look in the mirror at your reflection. One metallic normally makes you pop, and the other makes you look dead or sick. Let's say you looked better in silver. From there you are draped with colors of the Winter and Summer palates, with one of the two generally looking much better on you.

Unless you're me.

Neither the silver or the gold really did anything for me. My consultant sheepishly suggested I looked better in the gold, and from there, Spring (over Fall). Sure. Whatever. I'll take it. Just please god let me stop looking at my reflection in this mirror.

Two years later, my silver jewelry neglected and tarnished, I'm thinking maybe I'm not pure gold. Maybe I'm copper. Or brass (a copper and zinc alloy). Or maybe I'm less conductive. Maybe I'm hemp. Or stone. Or wood. Or clay. I might just be moonstone. Moonstone will for sure cool my rosy glow.

Or maybe my rosy cheeks are begging for the kinship of rose gold (a gold, copper, and silver alloy).

On second thought, I'm definitely an alloy. I'm a blend. A unique, non-uniform mutt. I'm not pure.

I'm optimized for malleability, affordability, and a beautiful blush.

Rose gold. That's me.

For now.
...

Unless there's a material for "over analytical". Mother fucker, that's gotta be silicon.